Help Wanted!!!

Did you ever dream about what you wanted to be when you grow up?  Maybe you, like me, still have that dream.  Thinking back to my childhood I wanted to be a teacher.  That made perfect sense to me since both of my parents were teachers, many of their siblings were teachers, their friends were teachers, even my grandfather was a teacher. That was what I knew; so when I grew up, I wanted to be a teacher.  (That changed once I realized there was more out there.)  It seems obvious that this would also be one of the top career choices of first graders.  It should be right up there with firefighters, doctors, police officers, and bus drivers.  

Well, my theory was blown out of the water when I pulled Jack’s project out of his backpack.  Jack put together a book about himself.  It included a lovely drawing of his family, where he lived, what he liked to eat, what he liked to do, and what he wanted to be when he grows up.  All of the drawings were as expected.  The one exception was on the last page… 

When I grow up, I want to be a hobo.

Like most things relating to my children, there is a good reason for everything they do.  I rarely get an “I don’t know” or “because” from my boys.  Instead, I get a long thought out, drawn out answer, or rather lecture, on why they did what they did (…hmm? Wonder who they are related to?...).  I’m not sure which one is better.  The conversation with Jack, once I stopped laughing, went something like this:

Me: Jack, really a hobo?

Jack: Yep! (Quite proud of himself)

Me: Why a hobo? And, who helped you spell hobo?

Jack: The teacher helped me.  I don’t know what I want to be and I thought it would be funny.  So, I want to be a hobo.  Did you see that I am fat and smoking?

Me:  You mean the teacher saw it?

Jack: Nope.  She just spells words when you ask her.  But, Mr. G saw it (the principal).

Me:  Oh great.  What did he say?

Jack:  He didn’t like it and made me do another one.  Look on the back.

Me:  (reading the page) When I grow up I want to be a Park Manager.

               

I initially thought to myself, now that makes sense.  We DID spend some time in the National and State parks this summer.  Jack DID insist on dressing like a park ranger.   So, I just assumed he wanted to be a Park Ranger and just confused the words.

For whatever reason, this assumption didn’t sit well with me.  Maybe it was because it was a little too obvious or maybe it was because I was surprised at his choice.  Then it came to me one evening when the boys were watching Regular Show on Cartoon Network.  Lo, and behold one of the characters was a Park Manager.

Me:  Jack, did you get Park Manager from Regular Show?

Jack: Yep! (Quite proud of himself!)

Me: And, your teacher saw that drawing?

Jack: Yep! And so did Mr. G.  I got them both!  (laughing)They don’t know that show.

Me:  Clearly!

I Eat Rocks, Trees, Dirt and Bugs Too.

The first day of school is one of the most exciting days of school for many.  Most kids can't wait to see their friends after a long summer vacation.  They are thrilled with new school supplies.  They like to pick out the first day of school outfit.  It is a celebration; a rite of passage.  Well, that wasn't the case for my son.  He let me know, more than *I* wanted, that HE JUST WASN'T GOING TO SCHOOL!

Well, for 5 year old Jack starting kindergarten wasn't an option.  He was going and would be just fine.  I felt for him because he didn't have the traditional pre-school experience, or any pre-school experience for that matter.  He spent his days at a Family Daycare.  It was at a house in a nice neighborhood with other kids although many left for pre-school around the age of three.  Why Jack refused to go to pre-school is a whole other blog post.   He daycare provider, Yaya, worked with Jack and he was "home schooled" for pre-school.  He knew everything the books said he should know so I thought he would be just fine.  The school was the same school his brother attended and we spend a lot of time there.  Jack knew his way around, knew the teachers and a lot of the older kids.  Like any parent, I started to prepare him for school by talking about it, playing it up as the best thing out there and acting excited that he was going to have this great experience.  Well, lets just say I was met with resistance.  And so it began early in the summer...


July 10, 2012
Jack:  It just doesn't make sense?
Me: What doesn't?
Jack:  Why I can't wear make-up.
Me: What do you mean?
Jack:  You say you wear make-up to make you look younger.  If I wore makeup I would look younger and be too young for school.


July 18, 2012
The latest reason Jack doesn’t want to go to Kindergarten…they don’t take naps.   Have you ever known a five-year-old who insists on taking naps?

July 20, 2012
Jack: What are you doing?
Me: Working on a flyer for your school. 
Jack: Oh, you mean Jimmy’s school because I’m not going.

July 23, 2012
Me: Do you want to go and buy a new lunch bag for school?
Jack: No. Why can’t you remember that I’m NOT going to school?

August 5, 2012 
Me: Let's go shopping for school supplies and a new outfit for school.
Jack:  I'm not going.
Me:  What do you mean you aren't going?  We can stop by Toys-R-Us.
Jack:  I'm not going to school so I don't need school supplies.  Why can't you remember?

August 13, 2012
Me: Jack, if you were going to school tomorrow do you think you will like it?
Jack: I’m not going.
Me: Well, if you were going to school tomorrow what would you like for your lunch?
Jack: I’m not going.
Me: Well, if you were going to school tomorrow are you going to wear your new shoes?
Jack: You just don’t get it. I AM NOT GOING. It just doesn’t make sense.
Me: What doesn’t?
Jack: Why do you keep asking me so many questions AND can’t remember I’m not going to school?

We finally made it to the first day of school.  Jack begrudgingly pick out an outfit from his new clothes. We packed his bag, made his lunch, and were out the door.  The tears were being held back by both of us.  For me, my baby was going to start school, and for him, he was going to start school.  We made it to the school and through the check in.  Everything was playing out as planned, no complaining, no tears, no resistance.  That was until we walked into the classroom....


First Day of School — Morning
After an hour and a half, I finally peeled a crying, sobbing 5-year-old off of my body for his first day of Kindergarten.  He still wasn’t going to school and made this comment, “all of the kids are weird looking and so is the teacher.  I just can’t stay here and look at them all day.”

First Day of School Afternoon
After hours (shall I say days or even weeks) of dramatic acting worthy of an Academy Award and comments worthy of a routine at the Comedy Store, Jack decided school was fun.
Me: What changed your mind about school today?
Jack: I stopped crying.
And, that was all it took.

Day 3 of School
 If you didn’t know about day 1, you wouldn’t think what happened was possible. He LOVES school and LOVES all of his new friends.  He’s told everyone who would listen about school, his friends and his beloved STAR dollars.
Jack: It just doesn’t make sense.
Me: What doesn’t?
Jack: Why I am able to behave for two whole days at school.
Me: Well, that is what I hope you would do.
Jack: It is the longest I’ve gone without being naughty.
(Let's hope he keeps it up.)

August 18, 2012 – Jack is in his element.
Me: How was school?
Jack: Good. Lunch was the best.
Me: Why was that?
Jack: My new friend asked why I like eating leaves (spinach). I told her I eat rocks, trees, dirt, and bugs too. Then she made a funny face and it was hilarious.

For all of you parents out there with kids just about starting school and not wanting to go, there is hope….